The Ties That Bind

July 29 2026

Our 100th birthday celebrations for Marjory are over, except for the awesome “card wall,” which we will leave up for several weeks.  We had a party for people who live in our condo building and another for family.  Marjory has no clue what it means that she is 100 years old, nor does she understand what a birthday is.  She did know, however, that she was the center of attention for a couple of weeks, people took time for her, they had “conversations” with her, and she received mail with her name on it.  

It did not take a psychologist to recognize that all of this pleased her.  She enjoyed it because it was done in a way to not overwhelm.  I had prepared her for family by encouraging her to look at her photo album I keep beside her recliner.  It contains pictures of her family.  She had 4 grandchildren and two great grandchildren attend.  I took a photo with each of them with Marjory.  I affixed them into a collage, on one page, with names, and then printed it out.  We added this to her family photo collection. 

She does not remember her family but there is something different about her when they come for a visit, as opposed to our neighbors visiting.  And she has the same look on her face when she views the photos of family.  Something deep inside connects.  

So when she looks at the fifty cards taped to the wall, I think she does remember some of the good things she felt during the week, but if not that is ok too.  It does not matter what your age is, if you have dementia or not, or even that you require a calm environment.  When a person is given some specialized attention, a focus that is just on them, and the support of someone who loves them, it is good.