I did not intend to be a caregiver. I retired from teaching and was very happy to do a bit of substitute teaching and educational writing. My husband, Calvin and I were spending about four out of seven days driving almost two hours north to help his mother who continued living independently in her home after her husband passed away. And then one day right after we left her, she fell. She lay on the floor, where her head just missed hitting the brick fire place seat, until the next day when the physical therapist could not get her to answer the door and called.
After a few days in the hospital we all knew she could no longer live alone. Not only was her physical health at risk but dementia was robbing her of stable mental health. My husband’s sister decided to take her from our midwestern city to California, her home. She had the space and knowledge as a retired nurse to give her the best care. For over three years this arrangement worked well, with my husband and myself going out one month each year to provide respite care.
Then one Saturday, I got a call from my sister-in-law. She’d had a major heart attack and needed our help. I flew out immediately and brought my mother-in-law back to Kansas City. My husband and I had moved into a local senior living cooperative and thankfully owned a two bedroom unit. We settled “Marjory” into that second bedroom, and I became a caregiver.
This site will feature my experiences as a caregiver, sharing things I have learned, Marjory’s great personality and sense of humor, and resources that might help another caregiver on the path.