Today I have some things on my to do lists that I’d like to get done, but I find myself watching our patio garden as the bees, hummingbirds, and butterflies frolic around the sugar in the hummingbird feeders. I took time to get a spray water bottle and spray off the tops of the feeders where the bees swarm, hoping they will leave it and go find some pollen somewhere so the butterflies and hummingbirds have better access. I don’t know if that will work. It is just something I thought might.
So these things I think I “need” to do get pushed back a bit. Then lots of humming birds fly around playing or fighting – how does one know? I watch. There are lots of tiny birds in the migration and they are amazing to watch. I am just wasting time, I tell myself. I should get busy. Then this blue winged butterfly comes to drink. I sit back down. I have to argue with myself to stop and enjoy these things that only come once a year for us to enjoy.
I am a caregiver for my mother-in-law, who just turned 100. She is not difficult at all. I enjoy her living with us and spending time with her. Yes, I am responsible for more laundry, food prep, disinfecting equipment she needs, getting her up and down from recliner to walker to wheelchair to toilet and back, getting her dressed, in bed, and up again. And yes I have hobbies that I enjoy. I do some appliqué with fabric, knit, sew, bake, work in our full, but small garden, exercise, and play my guitar. There are many times in my day that I have to decide which of these I will do.
One thing I often forget about is time to do none of these things. Taking time to enjoy what presents itself in the moment. Time to just stop and admire what God has created. When I think of the short seasons we have for so many of these tiny events, it makes me wonder what I’ve missed and makes me pay attention to the here and now.
Caregiving for a loved one is just one part of my life. I have to practice making the small moments count so it does not consume me. And though we work around Marjory’s daily needs, if we remain flexible we find time to relax, pursue hobbies, and get chores done. Sometimes my nails look ragged for a few days before I take time to tend to them, and sometimes we have peanut butter sandwiches for dinner. Thank goodness Marjory loves those too! And we also have our Senior Helper, Kelci, who comes three times a week to help out. Caregiving can be a viable option for your family, if you can be flexible, enjoy things you can do at home, and find pleasure in the small moments.
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